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Whether you’re a newbie and are looking at how to spice up your sex life or you’re the expert looking for fresh lines, get ready to dive into our fat list of dirty talk examples. A huge part of attraction for me is someone’s ability to tickle my brain, as I like to say. I like to know if my partner is turned on, more about what they enjoy and find sexy. Honestly it also stresses me out if i’m not sure what my partner is feeling. Even if it’s not technically dirty talk, the minimum requirement is knowing my partner is turned on. Jennifer Litner, PhD, a certified sex therapist, describes sounds as one of the key senses that can heighten arousal, especially for women.

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But it’s especially true when you’re establishing this more advanced style by adding layers of identity, specificity, and storytelling. Now, we’re not saying you need to dive headfirst into BDSM. And honestly, these labels can feel reductive and cheesy sometimes. But the kink community has done a fantastic job of building a helpful sandbox for playing with storytelling through sex that’s super useful groundwork for dirty talk. “You can get a sense for each other’s sexual energies even when you can’t be physical.” In the era of social-distancing, words have become one of our best replacements for physical intimacy.

What Makes It So Sexy?

You can always add spice, but if you cross the line you risk obliterating the mood and finding yourself among that unfortunate 1-in-5 statistic cited earlier. Setting boundaries through honest conversation is the safest way to navigate these waters. Sean Jameson is a sex expert and founder of the Bad Girl’s Bible website, where you can learn more advanced and ‘out there’ examples to help improve your sex life. Sexuality creates intimacy for a couple and becomes the glue of the relationship. “One possibility is maybe she has a dependent personality and maybe she likes the idea of submitting to a dominant, powerful force,” she said.

A great time to do this can be after sex when you’re relaxed and enjoying some pillow talk. This type of shared experience sex talk has been shown to increase sexual and relationship satisfaction. Additionally, women who engage in this mutualistic sex talk even report higher sexual functioning. Once you’re ready to try this with your partner, Cordingley recommends keeping the lights off or at a dim level, which may make you feel a little less exposed and inhibited. Start with small tidbits of feedback, says O’Reillyβ€”a simple β€œdon’t stop” or β€œthat feels so fucking good” can go a long way. Still, she stresses that the benefits outweigh the risks here.

But it at least gives you some material to work with until you feel more comfortable coming up with your own original material. You don’t have to be explicit.It’s easy to think that dirty talk is all vulgarities, but it can be far from thatβ€”the β€œdirt” is in the details. Begin by describing how your partner makes you feelβ€”just verbalizing the fact that they’re turning you on is a solid start. Or try asking them what they’d like you to do to them or describe what you’d like them to do to you. Just like allowing the physical parts of sex to progress slowly, you probably don’t want to go zero to 100 with your dirty talk either. Instead, let it support everything else that’s happening in the bedroom.

The pair discuss why dirty talk is such an important form of communication in relationships and how effective it can be when used properly. Carly is a master of dirty talk and gives Jess specific lines and examples that you can use tonight! Follow Carly on…TwitterFacebookInstagramThis podcast is brought to you by Desire Resorts. Read a piece of erotica you really enjoyed out loud together, discussing what specifically gets you off and whether your partner likes it too.

Now, even dirty talk experts can run into awkward situations now and again. After all, nobody is perfect and every sexual encounter is unique. Therefore, in times like these, you might need to implement some techniques to help defuse the situation.

Right now, even couples that are sheltering in place together can also benefit from exploring or investing more into dirty talk, too. Even if you and your Sex Mate don’t utter much more than β€œI like that,” doing some post-dirty-talk pillow talk is a good idea. But before you go calling your partner a β€œlittle slut,” it’s important you touch base with them.

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